London Underground by Adam Kay & Suman Biswas
Some people might like to get a train to work, or drive in in a beamer or a merc. Some guys like to travel in by bus But I can't be bothered with the fuss today, I'm gonna take my bike, 'cause once again the tube's on strike.
The greedy bastards want extra pay for sitting on their ass all day, even though they earn 30k, So I'm standing here in the pouring rain
Where the fuck's my fucking train?
London Underground! London Underground! They're all lazy fucking useless cunts London Underground! London Underground! They're all greedy cunts, I wanna shoot them all with a rifle!
All they say is please mind the doors! And they learn that on the two day course, this job could be done by a four year old, They just leave us freezing in the cold
What you smell is what you get. Burger king and piss and sweat You roast to death in the boiling heat, with tourists treading on your feet, and chewing gum on every seat
So don't tell me to mind the gap! I want my fucking money back! London Underground! London Underground! They're all lazy fucking useless cunts! London Underground! London Underground! They're all greedy cunts, I wanna shoot them all with a rifle!
The floors are sticky, and the seats are damp, every platform has a fucking tramp!
But the Divers get the day off when, we're all late for work again!
London underground! London underground!
Wa wa wankers,
They're all wankers!
Take your oyster card,
And shove it up your ass... hole!
(Lyrics By Miggeh/Esp)