Joining the cult Lyrics

Adam Sandler Lyrics Joining the cult

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A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Joining the cult


by Adam Sandler. Buy album CD: What The Hell Happened To Me?


Performed by Adam Sandler and Allen

Transcribed by Big Brother.

[Sounds of Basketball being shot around]
Sandler: "Hey man, I'm joining a religious cult."
Allen: "Now, that's ridiculous."
Sandler: "Well, I'm joining it, so you gotta sign up too."
Allen: "What are you talking about?"
Sandler: "Hey, don't fuck me on this, man, just sign up."
Allen: "No, I'm not going to join a cult!"
Sandler: "I can't believe you're pulling this shit on me after Monday night --"
Allen: "What?
Sandler: "-- I wanted to watch Monday Night Football and you wanted to watch that other show and we watched your show -- I did that for you!"
Allen: "Yeah, well, you kept flippin' back to the game."
Sandler: "I WANTED TO SEE THE FUCKIN' SCORE! Whadda you gotta do that's so fucking importnat you can't join the religious cult with me?"
Allen: "Well, I was gonna go sunbathing."
Sandler: "Oh, boy, no no, I don't think you should do that. Because this guy, Russell -- he's the leader-guy of the cult --"
Allen: "-- yeah --"
Sandler: "-- he was rambling on during one of the speeches about the sun being bad, like the beast can't come out because the sun's too bright and the sun hurts his eyes or something -- you show up all sunburned and that guy's gonna get pissed at you and me!"
Allen: "Well, I'm not in the cult, so I don't have to worry about pissing the leader guy off!"
Sandler: "Look, I'm -- starting to believe in some of the stuff the cult guy's been saying -- some of it makes a lot of sense!
Allen: "Well, good, but I don't want to join the cult. We can still hang out; I just won't be in it with you."
Sandler: "The point is, I'm not gonna have time to hang out with you because I'm gonna be fuckin' busy with this fuckin' cult!"
Allen: "So I'll visit on weekends -- we'll work it out."
Sandler: "No, the weekends are like the busiest time -- that's when we go to flea malls and fuckin' malls and talk people into joining, man!"
Allen: "Can I join for just a little while? I told my dad I'd go visit him in Florida in three weeks."
Sandler: "Well, just, we'll ask then, but we gotta join now."
Allen: "What's the hurry?"
Sandler: "There's a girl I wanna meet there, what the fuck's your problem?"
Allen: "Well, I mean I don't really have to believe in this stuff, do I?"
Sandler: "No, no, just fuckin' tell everybody you believe in this shit -- when they say the sun sucks, go, "Yeah, fuck the sun, I fuckin' hate it too, long live the fuckin' beast."
Allen: "I don't know, man. This is crazy."
Sandler: "Look, they're gonna give you clothers, a free haircut, you're gonna get food --"
Allen: "-- it's not gonna be one of those weird haircuts, is it?"
Sandler: "It's gonna be a haircut, all right? You said you need a haircut, they're gonna fuckin' cut your hair. You're going in, saving twelve bucks, just fuckin' do it!"
Allen: "Do you think the hot girl has a friend for me?"
Sandler: "Yeah, sure, and if she doesn't, she'll go out and recruit one for you!"
Allen: "Well, all right. But, hey, if I don't like it, I'm going to escape, man."
Sandler: "OK, that's up to you."

"Three weeks later!"

[Chanting repeatedly] "The night time is the right time! The night time is the right time!"
Sandler: "Hey buddy, are you glad you did this?"
Allen: "Oh, this is the best thing I ever did. Thank you."
Sandler: "You're not mad at them making you, uh, kill your father, are you?"
Allen: "You know, it's like they said. It was the only way to save him."
Sandler: "You're a good guy."
Allen: "You're a better one."
[Chanting resumes]



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Album: What The Hell Happened To Me? (1996) Lyrics
cd Buy "What The Hell Happened To Me?" CD
  1. Do it for mama
  2. The chanukah song
  3. The excited southerner gets a job interview
  4. The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Girl
  5. Joining the cult
  6. Respect
  7. Ode to my car
  8. The excited southerner orders a meal
  9. The goat
  10. The Chanuka Song
  11. The excited southerner gets pulled over
  12. The hypnotist
  13. Steve Polychronopolous
  14. The excited southerner at a job interview
  15. Do it for your mama
  16. Crazy love
  17. The excited southerner meets mel gibson
  18. The adventures of the cow
  19. Dip Doodle
  20. The excited southerner proposes to a woman
  21. Memory lane
  22. Mr. Bake-o
  23. Sex or weight lifting
  24. What the hell happened to me?

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