Soundtracks: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

List of artists: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #



Recommended site
A-Z Lyrics Universe
Lyrics/song texts are property and copyright of their owners and provided for educational purposes.

The Speed Test Lyrics

 

The Speed Test Song Lyrics


MR. GRAYDON:
Take a letter. To a Mr. John Hudson, Hudson's Floor Wax. You will find an invoice in the file for the address. "Dear Mr. Hudson," colon:
My eyes are fully open to my awful situation
So I'm writing you a letter to demand an explanation
When the floor wax that we bought from you
Arrived here Monday morning
We discovered upon usage that the fume
Should have a warning
Since the only possibility is that the wax is rancid
I request a full refund of all the money we advanced
And unless you can convince me
You've improved the floor wax batter
We will take our business elsewhere
So I hope you solve this matter
How's my speed, Miss Dillmount?
MILLIE:
A little slow, perhaps.
MR. GRAYDON:
Ah!
Enclosed you'll find a small container
Of the stuff I talk about
Just carefully remove the lid
And take a whiff if you've a doubt
I'm sure you wouldn't want me
To alert the daily papers
With the news of how our office
Was affected by your vapours
Which is why I choose to write to you
A confidential letter
Full of strong recommendation
That you make your floor wax better
I just hope it won't require us
To have our floor relaid and
If it does you may expect a bill
Sincerely, Trevor Graydon
Now, read that back to me please.
MILLIE:
Certainly. "Dear Mr. Hudson," colon:
My eyes are fully open to my awful situation
So I'm writing you a letter to demand an explanation
When the floor wax that we bought from you
Arrived here Monday morning
We discovered upon usage that the fume
Should have a warning
Since the only possibility is that the wax is rancid
I request a full refund of all the money we advanced
MR. GRAYDON:
Nice!
MILLIE:
And unless you can convince me
You've improved the floor wax batter
We will take our business elsewhere
So I hope you solve this matter
MR. GRAYDON:
Not half bad. Continue please.
MILLIE:
Enclosed you'll find a small container
Of the stuff I talk about
Just carefully remove the lid
And take a whiff if you've a doubt
I'm sure you wouldn't want me
To alert the daily papers
With the news of how our office
Was affected by your vapours
Which is why I choose to write to you
A confidential letter
Full of strong recommendation
That you make your floor wax better
I just hope it won't require us
To have our floor relaid and
If it does you may expect a bill
Sincerely, Trevor Graydon
MR. GRAYDON:
Miss Dillmount, may I speak frankly?
MILLIE:
Yes?
MR. GRAYDON:
If I could be so lucky
As to have a good stenographer
To keep this place as up-to-date
As her short skirt and bobbed coiffure
I wouldn't have to worry 'bout
Our soured office planking
And could concentrate on generating
Profits ripe for banking
That is why I'm testing you
With this outrageous correspondence
Which I don't intend to actually mail
To the respondents
So if you can make sense of my unintelligble patter
Then the job is yours and Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter
MILLIE:
Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter?
Matter, matter, matter, matter
Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter?
Matter, matter, matter, matter
MR. GRAYDON (at the same time):
Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter!
Matter, matter, matter, matter
Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter!
OFFICE WORKERS (at the same time):
Hudson's Floor Wax doesn't matter!
Matter, matter, matter, matter
MR. GRAYDON:
Now, I want that letter on my desk in two minutes flat. Man your machine! Go!
(Millie's rapid fire typing/tapping dazzles the office workers. She presents the finished letter to Mr. Graydon.)
Time! "Dear Mr. Hudson,"
MILLIE AND OFFICE WORKERS:
Colon.
MR. GRAYDON:
My eyes are fully open to my awful situation
So I'm writing you a letter to demand an explanation
When the floor wax that we bought from you
Arrived here Monday morning
We discovered upon usage that the fume
Should have a warning
Since the only possibility is that the wax is rancid
I request a full refund of all the money we advanced
And unless you can convince me
You've improved the floor wax batter
We will take our business elsewhere
So I hope you solve this matter
MILLIE AND OFFICE WORKERS:
So I hope you solve this matter
So I hope you solve this matter
So I hope you solve this matter
Matter, matter, matter, matter
MR. GRAYDON:
Going on.
Enclosed you'll find a small container
Of the stuff I talk about
Just carefully remove the lid
And take a whiff if you've a doubt
I'm sure you wouldn't want me
To alert the daily papers
With the news of how our office
Was affected by your vapours
Which is why I choose to write to you
A confidential letter
Full of strong recommendation
That you make your floor wax better
I just hope it won't require us
To have our floor relaid and
If it does you may expect a bill
Sincerely, Trevor Graydon
You have made the team Miss Dillmount!
OFFICE WORKERS:
You have made the team Miss Dillmount!
MILLIE:
Tell me where my desk is
When we eat lunch
How much I'll be paid, and
Nice to meet you, I know we'll be friends
Just call me Millie Graydon
MR. GRAYDON and OFFICE WORKERS:
Millie Graydon?
MILLIE:
I mean Dillmount!
MR. GRAYDON and OFFICE WORKERS:
Millie Dillmount?
MILLIE:
Someday Graydon!
MR. GRAYDON and OFFICE WORKERS:
Graydon? Dillmount? Dillmount?
Graydon? Graydon? Dillmount?
MILLIE:
Graydon!
ALL:
Ahhhhhhh!


Thoroughly Modern Millie Lyrics

Soundtrack for Movie, 2002
The Speed Test Lyrics from Thoroughly Modern Millie Soundtrack (2002). Rating: 4.2/5 (28 votes)