A nice place to visit…

A nice place to visit… Lyrics

I take a look around

think of places I have been

there really aren't too many

I would like to see again

I've been to 30

8 of 50 states

most of them I'd shut down

3 or 4 of them are great

back on the east coast

dc's a little sh*t hole

you'll freeze to death in JERSEY

but florida's the best

I think I would rather have

prostate cancer

than visit oklahoma

it's those Sooner's I detest

when I see the coast

I'm at home at last

take the Lincoln Monument

and cram it up your ass

Jesus-Motherf**king-Christ, a giant ball of yarn!

don't forget to see that thing

when you're on your way to Yuma

KOA is A-OK

but they ain't got no Shoney's

I love turquoise

and shells of abalone

testicular tumors

sound so much nicer

than seeing Dollywood

in the hills of tennessee

sentence me to life

in a tijuana prison

I don't really care

feed Dorito's to the bears

fireworks here and there

California is for me

m-i-s-s-i-s-s-i-(FART!)-i!

zillions of mosquitos are

gnawing on my thigh

I really love antiquing

I bought some decoy ducks

in some states your sister

is the only one you f**k

the nascar whores of north carolina

with ovarian cysts

the size of missouri

do yourself and stay in California

bye...bye...bye....goodbye!