Friends

Friends Lyrics

He was quiet, he was shy A stay-at-home sort of guy Someone you'd trust your sister with Had a twinkle in his eye Yet they say he was psychotic They say psychotically disturbed He was mentally unbalanced, a schizophrenic mass murderer with severe personality disorders They used their jargonistic words So he killed and mutilated Served his victim on a tray But Jeffrey Dahmer was my friend, okay? Tuesday nights we'd go out bowling And he'd blow those pins to hell He'd watch what he'd eat And it watched him as well Friends, friends We can all be friends If we just let the little hurt Between us mend I met him at the circus He was hiding in the dark Pulling funny faces Making people laugh They say he was a freak They say genetically deformed Should have sold his body to science The minute he was born But he'd just smile and say, "[slurp] You've all been very kind." Yes, yes, John Merrick, the Elephant Man Was a friend of mine We'd all go out on blind dates Hessian bags over our heads We never slept like normal kids We'd sit straight up in bed Friends, friends We can all be friends If we just let the little hurt Between us mend He was a painter, quite artistic He had that suave panache A tasteful brown shirt And a cute toothbrush moustache Yeah, he loved his German Shepherd Walking by the babbling brook Watching blond haired, blue eyed children Setting fire to books Yet they say he was a monster Rhe leader of the Reich But Adolf Hitler he was my friend, alright? He loved to go out dancing, Really dug the human league And that song by Alice Cooper, "Only Women Bleed" Friends, friends We can all be friends If we just let the little hurt Between us mend Friends - He murdered 17 million of the bourgeoisie But Joseph Stalin was a friend to me! Friends - Some say he shot the president - is that crime? Lee Harvey Oswald was a friend of mine Friends - He pillaged, was the scourge of Eastern Europe But Ghangis Khan was my good rocking buddy! Friends - She's cute, sort of awkward, her closes barely fit her But Myra Henley was my baby-sitter Friends - Charlie Manson never killed Sharon Tate He's "Lucky Chucky" to his mates Friends - David Koresh never died in that fire He's our friend, our buddy, our messiah Friends - Jack the Ripper gave his heart to me Friends - Idiah Min and I played quoits Friends - Margaret Thatcher was a pitcher, not a catcher Friends - Pol Pot was a friend of mine Friends - Noriega was a friend of mine Friends - Ceaucesu was a friend of mine Friends - Pinochet was a friend of mine Friends - Michael Jackson was a friend of mine... Come on, boys, can't we love one another? Even Oedipus had a mother Friends, friends We can all be friends If we just let the little hurt Between us mend Friends, friends We can all be friends If we just let the little hurt Between us mend