The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Girl by Adam Sandler
Girl: "You wanted to ask me something?"
Excited Southerner: "Yes, I did. I -
first of all I just wanted to say that you're -
- very pretty girl, and I, I --
hoo -- you'the -- we've known each other for so long now,
and-uh, it's about time that the two of us --
we're both getting older right now, and-uh,
and I don't want to die alone, I -- tell you that much --
hoo -- getting ahead of myself -- got ta slow down, hoo-hoo,
concentrate on what I'm trying to get across to you right now, hoo,
I mean, whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-whe-willing
to be a house husband, you don't have to qu-qu-qu-qu-quit your
job there, there, I'm, I'm, the-, I'm, I'm --
hoo, honeymoon in the Poconos, with the -- hoo, woo hoo
-- sex optional -- you don't have to do what you don't want to do,
hoo hoo hoo hoo, someday you're going to love me, and that --
that's fi-- til death do us part I, we'll get the chocolate cake
and the sunrise and the sunset -- no prenuptial agree --"
Girl: "Look, are you trying to ask me to marry you?
Because I'm just not ready for that kind of commitment."
Excited Southerner: "Coooooo."