Sensitivity Song Lyrics
I’m just loaded with that.
In this one word is the epitomy of the aristocrat
Sensitive soul, and sensitive stomach, sensitive hands and feet;
This is the blessing, also the curse of being the true elite.
Common people don’t know what exquisite agony is,
Suffered by gentle people like me!
Just get your hands off me!
Think up a tricky test for that wretched moat-swimming princess.
Madame may I suggest, Maybe we ought to…
Don’t take all night, I’m not well, I need my rest.
Not that I’ll ever sleep on that lumpy mattress, oh God my back!
Sensitivity bane of roalty, that bed’s a torture rack.
Oh I hate to sound grumpy, but my nerves are so jumpy.
I am sure I could feel any lump, even if it were under the mattress
And small as a pea!
That’s the answer! Under the mattress… We’ll test her tonight!
One tiny pea beneath one thick downy mattress. Oh God! You’re bright!
Any genuine princess would feel it, if she doesn’t she’s through!
Get the tiniest pea and order one mattress, No! Make it two!
Why not five?
Ten I think would be plenty.
Better still, make it twenty.
And to play it safe, in the event even that’s not enough to make sure she sleeps
We’ll give her a soothing sedative, won’t we? You can whip up a drink.
Something stunning; Ah…Oh, but your devlish.
I love the way you think.
She’s insensitive, so insensitive; She’ll fall asleep no doubt!
God, but you’re clever! Brilliant! A genus! You are divine! Get Out!
[Thanks to firstname.lastname@example.org for lyrics]