Hit the switch

Hit the switch Lyrics

i'm staring out into that vacuum again
from the back porch of my mind
the only thing that's alive
i'm all there is
and i start attacking my vodka
stab the ice with a straw
my eyes have turned red as stoplights
you seem ready to walk
you know i'll call you eventually
when i wanna talk
till then you're invisible

cause there's a switch that gets hit
& it all stops making sense.
& in the middle of drinks, maybe the 5th
or the 6th, i'm completely alone at a
table of friends.
i feel nothing for them.
i feel nothing.
nothing.

well, i need a break from the city again
I think I'll ship myself back west.
I got a friend there, she says "hey, any time."
unless that offers expired, i have been less
than frequent.
she's under no obligation to indulge every whim
& i'm so ungrateful, i take, she gives &forgives.
& i keep forgetting it.
& each morning she wakes with a dream to
describe, something lovely that bloomed from
her beautiful mind. I said "I'll trade you one
for two nightmares of mine. i have some where
i die. I have some where we all die."

I'm thinking of quitting drinking again,
i know i said that a couple of times. &i'm
always changing my mind, well, i guess i am.
but there's this burn in my stomach
& there's this pain in my side.
& when i kneel at the toilet, &the mornings
clean light pours in through the window
sometimes i pray i don't die.
I'm a goddamn hypocrite.

but the night rolls around &it all starts making
sense. there is no right way or wrong way, you
just have to live. so i do what i do & at least I
exist. what could mean more than this?
what could mean more?
mean more?
ooh.